Holidays!!

I didn't think I'd have a chance to do any blogging this trip; but here I am on my son's computer (he's at Uni, so he doesn't know). Our trip to Sydney was very relaxing - we took our time, met up with some friends at a caravan stop, and have spent the last few days trying to find time to spend with our son.

Mark has been a little stressed out and grumpy for most of the trip - just nervous about the caravan and the wedding; but after the wedding I'm sure he'll settle down a bit. Money is his main concern! I don't know why, God always blesses us with what we need. As my old mate, Bob Gass says:

"It takes maturity to understand that if God doesn't supply it,
you don't need it. If you needed it, he'd give it to you."



I don't know if I'm mature, Mark would call me `uncaring'. My theory is - if we run out of money, we stay put until pay day. That's what Mum and Dad do!! So far, we haven't stayed in any caravan parks - our biggest expense up to date has been washing. Aaron doesn't have a washing machine yet, and the Laundrys here charge you by the `kilo', rather than the wash. Yesterday our washing costs $17 - it was to be $25, but we took out the heavier stuff. Today Mark took Aaron's clothes down to wash (he said he was running out), and it cost $35. Unbelievable!

One thing that is believable is our PRAYER and READING THE WORD has helped us on our trip. I am a great believer that starting the day in the word is the the only way to get your day started. I even made up a little song about it, but I forgot to write it down. This is something I hope I can pass on to my son and his new lovely wife. (Mark hasn't written his wedding speech yet, maybe I can add that in).

The other day Emily's Mum Ros, who is very outgoing, said that she and I should do the speeches: 1) Because our husbands are both really shy.
2) She hates Mark's jokes. Hah!! Hah!!

At the moment I am reading a great little book on PRAYER by Bob Gass. What I love about his writings are that he always follows up what he says with Scripture.

"Without time spent in prayer what do we have to draw on? You'll work harder and accomplish less because you're operating in your own strength. But after you've prayed, you'll struggle less and accomplish more because you're operating in His strength." Bob Gass

Paul had a lot to say about this, particularly in his letter to the Philippians. I wonder if this was an area they struggled in. I love Paul's encouraging words in this letter, but of course the best words are:

"I can do anything through Christ who gives me
strength." Philippians 4:13

"

I can't stop sharing!!

I know I promised that I would move on and you wouldn't have to listen to my journalling anymore. But I just have to share about the wonderful way God is working in my life at the moment. Like my father (see earlier blog) I have faced a lot of grief in my life, and have lived with depression for many years.

Recently I was reading a book with a friend, and in it was one of those `grief timelines' - you know the denial, the anger, the depression - which is always where I have seemed to stop. I have never been able to get past that `level'.

As you know, recently I changed workplaces - and CHANGE can sometimes be a type of grief, depending on whether it is a positive or negative change. I started off with the denial, the anger - then there was the trying to change the situation myself, rather than leaning on God - and of course the depression.

In this book we are reading, I discovered too more levels, after the depression - 1) Trials and 2) Victory (or words to that effect). In the last few weeks, I have felt that I am moving out of the depression stage, for the first time, since being diagnosed in 1998. I am not ready to go off the medication (I've tried that before, but with clinical depression, it doesn't work); I still have my bad days. But now I see them as trials. Trials, that with the help of the Lord, my family and friends, can lead to victory.

I still go to school every Wednesday and Friday, and without fail will get into `trouble' - in some jobs you just can't make anybody happy. But instead of the tears, and the `giving up' mentality - I now have the `you can get through this, because the Lord wants you here.' I now don't wake up every morning, dreading going to work. I don't come home at the end of each day depressed, and ready to quit. I wake up ready to face what the Lord has in store for me, to give myself in service to others, and to come home excited about how God has used me that day.

I may not be in the total VICTORY stage, and may never get there. But I am learning how to have victory in those `small things' each day, victory you can only have through a relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ.

"Therefore, we, who have fled to him for refuge,
can take new courage, for we can hold on to his
promises with CONFIDENCE. This CONFIDENCE is like
a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls."
HEBREWS 6:18&19

At my old Church I used to be one of the WORSHIP LEADERS. I would always choose a song that summed up how I was feeling that week, and it usually related really well to the `theme' of the rest of the service. If I was worship leading this week my song would be `VICTORY IN JESUS" (yes, I am a hymn person.)

In 1939, the author of this hymn Eugene M Bartlett had a serious stroke and was partially paralyzed. He used to travel around with his music ministry, but now he was confined to his bed. But, as he said, `I can still study the Bible'. he struggled to put down words on paper, and this is one of the songs he wrote.

"I heard and old, old story, how a Saviour came in glory
How He gave His life on calvary to save a wretch like me.
I heard about His groaning, of His precious blood atoning,
Then I repented of my sins and won the victory.

O VICTORY IN JESUS, MY SAVIOUR FOREVER,
HE SOUGHT ME AND BOUGHT ME, WITH HIS REDEEMING BLOOD.
HE LOVED ME ERE I KNEW HIM, AND ALL MY LOVE IS DUE HIM,
HE PLUNGED ME INTO VICTORY BENEATH THE CLEANSING FLOOD.

I heard about His healing, of His cleansing power revealing
How He mad the lame to walk again, and caused the blind to see.
And then I cried, `Dear Jesus, come and heal my broken spirit'
And somehow Jesus came and brought to me the victory.

I heard about a mansion He has built for me in glory.
And I heard about the streets of gold beyond the crystal sea.
About the angels singing, and the old redemption story
And some sweet day I'll sing up there the song of victory.

Eugene M Bartlett, 1939. (The Complete Book of Hymns: William & Ardythe Peterson)

I should be!!

I SHOULD BE doing the vacuming but I just don't have the energy - it is still so warm for this time of year. I SHOULD BE doing some school work - but I can't get my brain into gear. I SHOULD BE finishing the filing - but most of the stuff is Mark's. I really am good at making excuses!!

Recently I was `told' by a friend that I am also quite good at COMPLAINING (not really in those words, but I got her drift). I SHOULD BE on the reading and helper roster - it's been 5 months now. I SHOULD BE able to buy myself something now and then without getting our account being overdrawn - I do earn the money. I SHOULD BE able to `quit' my job - I am just not happy at the moment.

Don't we have a lot of `SHOULD BE's' in our lives? Things we don't want to do and things we want to do, but God has other ideas.

"In everything you do, stay away from complaining
and arguing, so that no one can speak a word of
blame against you. You are to live clean, innocent
lives as children of God in a dark world full of
crooked and perverse people. Let your light shine
brightly before them." Philippians 2:14&15

I visited a friend in hospital this morning, and not surprisingly she was feeling a little negative. She was unhappy with the doctors, unhappy with her treatment, and simply bored. I asked her if there was anything I could bring her, and her answer surprized me - `just yourself'.

Why was I surprized? Well, she isn't really what you would call a `people person'; and I have been a little negative myself lately - I'd be the last person you'd want around.

As our minister said this morning, 'The best thing to do when your feeling depressed, is to do something for someone else - to think about the needs of others, rather than yourself.'.

When you are in a `SHOULD BE' mood - lazy and selfish, full of complaints - put your eyes in the WORD and your thoughts on SOMEONE ELSE. It works wonders!!

Daddy Dear!!

I have been looking over some old photos of my Dad's family, preparing for my next Scrapbook (which I can't afford to do at the moment). He loved the beach and playing cricket with his dad. Then there were the soldiering days After the war, it was life as a farmer, and then with my Mum, into Bible College. (all before my time).
What I remember is an `old man', who each night would sit us on his knee, tell us Bible Stories and sing us songs. I remember a man who told me all about how Jesus had died for me and that he wanted to be my friend.

As I sat in the Good Friday service this morning, one of the members got up to sing a solo; and if I didn't know better, I would have thought it was my dad. He just loved singing in Church - he just loved PRAISING THE LORD! Whether it be words or music, THANKS seem to flow from his lips.

Although I never knew him, I know my Dad loved his brother, who had drowned as a young teenager. Dad loved my Mum who died when she was a young mother. I remember the great times we had with his parents, before they passed away. Dad struggled with depression and grief, most of his life. But what I remember most is those arms raised and that voice full of the joy to the Lord. Thanks Dad!!

"Always be JOYFUL. Keep on praying. No matter what happens, always be THANKFUL, for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus." 1 THESSALONIANS 5:16-18

MOVING ON!!

Today is my one day a week I get a little bit of extra `morning' time as the school I visit is just around the corner. I get to go on a walk, without worrying about `rushing'; and after reading the Word, I sometimes get a chance to sit down and `BLOG'.

I think it is just the end of term, but I really can't wait for those `sleep in' mornings - I am just so tired. I know many people `joke seriously' about the number of holidays teachers get - but after 11 weeks of not just teaching, but `counselling, planning lessons etc; we really do need the break.

Being the recluse I am - I just need some time out from `teachers and principals'.

Recently I have been looking at why I started a BLOG. It was originally so that I could have a place to share my `writings' with others. I can't afford a publisher, so I thought maybe this way I could encourage others. I was going to transfer my original `manuscripts' - both devotionial, childrens books and educational `manuals'; but with all my journalling I haven't had time to do this.

My son asked me to write a journal - a link to him - and I have discovered at times an encouragement. He seems to take more notice of what I say now, than he ever did!! But I might find another way to do this, because my journals are a little `revealing'.

So this may be a goodbye! Maybe I am just moving on - you will still have my `links'. I am sure, that if God blesses me, I will find it very hard not to share it with you. So don't give up on me yet!!

School time!! Have a great Easter break!!

"Don't copy the behaviour and customs of this world.
Let God TRANSFORM YOU INTO A NEW PERSON, by changing
the way you think. Then you will know what God wants
you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and
perfect His will really is." ROMANS 12:2

" Do not throw away this confident trust in the Lord,
no matter what happens. Remember the great reward it
brings you. Patient endurance is what you need now,
so you will continye to do God's will." HEBREWS 10:13

" Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd
of witnessing to the life of faith, let us strip off
every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that
so easily hinders our progress. Let us run with endurance
the race that God has set before us." HEBREWS 12:1

"I am sure that God, who began this good work within you, will
continue His work until it is finally finished on that day
when Christ Jesus comes back again." PHILIPPIANS 1:6

"Be strong and steady, always enthusiastic about the Lord's work,
for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is useless."
1 CORINTHIANS 15:38



"I don't mean to say that I have already achieved these things or
that I have already reached perfection! But I keep working toward
that day when I will finally be all that Christ saved me for and
wants me to be." PHILIPPIANS 3:12

"So let us stop going over the basics of Christianity again and again.
Let us go on instead and become mature in our understanding." HEBREWS 6:1


* I was trying to find a verse. I knew it, and I was sure I knew where it came from. Oh well, during my search I found all these other wonderful encouraging words. I did finally find the verse I was looking for. Aren't Bible's wonderful!!!

What Happens When We Pray?

As I have been feeling a little miserable of late, I decided to have a look had some of the wondrous prayers that God has answered.

1) As a mother I prayed for many years that my son would find a Church he was happy in and a lovely Christian wife. (I didn't expect it to happen so soon). But we all know - God answers prayer in his time, not ours.

2)Since we were first married, 25 years ago, I have been praying that my husband would become the spiritual leader of our home. As he now reads his Bible everyday, and last night was reading a book I gave him `Praying for Your Wife', I realized that he is on the right track.

3) Since I began leading Kids Club 2 years ago, we have been praying for more leaders and helpers. Last Friday night my co-leader and I sat watching 4 young `leaders' leading the group in games. They did a wonderful job!!

4) At Church we have also been praying for new committed members, to not only come to Church, but to become involved in ministry. For the last 3 months I have not been on the Roster for reading. Although something I love doing, it is great seeing other new faces up there.

Lately I have come to Church and Kids Club worried that I am not needed anymore. This morning I woke up feeling so unspiritual, I was sure that now my husband is becoming a spiritual leader, maybe I am `losing it'. As for Aaron, he will soon have his lovely wife to look after him - he won't need Mum anymore.

No wonder I've been feeling so miserable!! I know I can't have it both ways. Expect my prayers to be answered, and then complain when they are; but maybe this is my next step to GROWTH.

In his book, "God Came Near", Max Lucado says, in his usual challenging way:

"Perhaps changes are in the air right now. It's disrupting isn't it? You like the branch. You've grown accustomed to it. You've been a pretty good branch sitter. And then you hear the call, `I need you out on the limb'...... Regardless of the nature of the call, the consequences are the same: civil war. Though your heart may say `yes;, your feet say `no'. Eventually you are lefy staring at a bare tree and a hard choice. HIS WILL OR YOURS!!"

I sing about it all the time, I pray about it all the time - but when it comes down to it - WHY IS IT SO HARD???

Appreciate your comments!!

Friendships!!

I realize it has been a while since I've written. Recently I sabotaged a really good friendship by letting my writing get away from my brain. She said it didn't matter and it was forgotten, but when I noticed that she had taken her face off my `followers' list I knew I'd `done it again'.

Mark and I are very `recluse' people. We don't get a lot of visitors, and we don't have a lot of close friends. I always just blamed it on our `army lifestyle'; but now I think it might be just ME!!

God's Word has a lot to say about FRIENDSHIPS.

"A friend loves at all times" Proverbs 17:17 (I'm pretty good at that one).

"A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother" Proverbs 18:24 (I try hard with this one).

"Two are better than one for they have a good return for their work. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help them up." Ecclesiastes 4:9&10 (I thank the Lord for these people in my life.)

"He who covers an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter seperates close friends." Proverbs 17:9 (This is the one we need to be careful of).

Honesty is important, but if we let our emotions get in the way, and don't ask the Lord for guidance - our words can hurt, rather than heal!!

"The tongue is a small part of the body; but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest can be set on fire by a small spark. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. No man can tame to tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison." James 3:5&6, 8

I learnt this the hard way - don't fall into the same trap!!

"Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones." Proverbs 16:24

"An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up." Proverbs 12:25

THIS IS WHAT FRIENDSHIP IS ALL ABOUT!!